1
00:00:03,699 --> 00:00:04,047
.

2
00:00:04,091 --> 00:00:05,396
[elevator bell dings]

3
00:00:05,440 --> 00:00:12,012
♪

4
00:00:12,055 --> 00:00:13,361
- Oh, hey, Jake.

5
00:00:13,404 --> 00:00:14,666
What's--what's the deal
with the office today?

6
00:00:14,710 --> 00:00:16,233
It--it feels crazy.

7
00:00:16,277 --> 00:00:17,495
- Somebody stole
20 bricks of coke

8
00:00:17,539 --> 00:00:18,801
and some machine guns
from evidence.

9
00:00:18,844 --> 00:00:20,716
- What? It's the first
I'm hearing of it.

10
00:00:20,759 --> 00:00:22,152
- Yeah, well,
you just got here, right?

11
00:00:22,196 --> 00:00:24,546
- Right. I need you to find
whoever did this

12
00:00:24,589 --> 00:00:27,201
and kill them...

13
00:00:27,244 --> 00:00:29,333
till they're dead.

14
00:00:29,377 --> 00:00:32,119
Bonkers morning, huh?
So, any idea who did it?

15
00:00:32,162 --> 00:00:33,511
- No, but whoever it was

16
00:00:33,555 --> 00:00:35,600
had an intimate knowledge
of our security systems.

17
00:00:35,644 --> 00:00:37,428
It was obviously
an inside job.

18
00:00:37,472 --> 00:00:39,735
- I bet it was Brian.
- Why do you say that?

19
00:00:39,778 --> 00:00:43,608
- Because...he once said
he has a hot tub.

20
00:00:43,652 --> 00:00:44,696
You know how that crowd is.

21
00:00:44,740 --> 00:00:46,611
- I didn't know
Brian had a hot tub.

22
00:00:46,655 --> 00:00:48,091
That does sound bad.
- Yeah.

23
00:00:48,135 --> 00:00:49,745
- But we have to let the
investigation run its course.

24
00:00:49,788 --> 00:00:52,139
Right now,
everyone's a suspect.

25
00:00:52,182 --> 00:00:53,531
- Except for
Hitchcock and Scully.

26
00:00:53,575 --> 00:00:55,185
Whoever did it took the stairs.
- What'll happen

27
00:00:55,229 --> 00:00:57,361
to the person, you know,
if you find them?

28
00:00:57,405 --> 00:00:58,841
- Well, they've committed
several felonies.

29
00:00:58,884 --> 00:01:00,495
Probably looking at, uh,
30-to-life.

30
00:01:00,538 --> 00:01:04,499
- So that person
could miss 15 Olympics.

31
00:01:04,542 --> 00:01:07,067
Cool.

32
00:01:07,110 --> 00:01:08,068
I have to go.

33
00:01:08,111 --> 00:01:09,678
♪

34
00:01:09,721 --> 00:01:11,201
They know
the drugs are missing.

35
00:01:11,245 --> 00:01:13,856
They don't suspect me because
I'm playing it super cool.

36
00:01:13,899 --> 00:01:15,553
Now, when is the handoff?

37
00:01:15,597 --> 00:01:18,382
Yes, I'm alone
in the ladies' room.

38
00:01:18,426 --> 00:01:20,167
No one can hear me.

39
00:01:20,210 --> 00:01:21,646
- Okay, so I know something,

40
00:01:21,690 --> 00:01:24,301
but you can't ask
how I know it.

41
00:01:24,345 --> 00:01:25,650
- Debbie...
- It's Debbie.

42
00:01:25,694 --> 00:01:27,130
- Took the coke and the guns.
- Debbie, right?

43
00:01:27,174 --> 00:01:28,740
- Yeah. We know it's Debbie.
- Acting super suspicious.

44
00:01:28,784 --> 00:01:31,743
[upbeat music]

45
00:01:31,787 --> 00:01:38,794
♪

46
00:01:49,544 --> 00:01:51,154
- Debbie, can I see you
in my office?

47
00:01:51,198 --> 00:01:52,677
- Yeah, sure.
What's this about?

48
00:01:52,721 --> 00:01:54,592
- We'll talk in my office.
- It'll just take a minute.

49
00:01:54,636 --> 00:01:56,464
- Oh. Heh. Wow.

50
00:01:56,507 --> 00:01:58,509
This morning's
full of surprises, huh?

51
00:01:58,553 --> 00:02:01,208
First, that stolen cocaine
that Hot Tub Brian took,

52
00:02:01,251 --> 00:02:03,471
now this unrelated thing
following me.

53
00:02:03,514 --> 00:02:04,689
Ha--you know what?

54
00:02:04,733 --> 00:02:06,169
I think I'm gonna
go make a sandwich

55
00:02:06,213 --> 00:02:07,431
I just--I love sandwiches.

56
00:02:07,475 --> 00:02:08,519
I'll meet you in there.

57
00:02:08,563 --> 00:02:09,825
Guilty of loving sandwiches,
right?

58
00:02:09,868 --> 00:02:11,174
[laughs]
- Debbie.

59
00:02:11,218 --> 00:02:12,654
- Mmm, what do I want
in my sandwich?

60
00:02:12,697 --> 00:02:15,439
Let's see.
Definitely ham, cheese,

61
00:02:15,483 --> 00:02:16,875
baking soda for sure,

62
00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:19,835
French vanilla creamer,
ooh, orange chicken. [laughs]

63
00:02:19,878 --> 00:02:21,576
Ah!
- Debbie!

64
00:02:21,619 --> 00:02:23,186
- [grunts]
- Ooh!

65
00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:24,448
- You really thought
you'd get away with it?

66
00:02:24,492 --> 00:02:26,363
- Damn, Scully!
- I was planning on eating

67
00:02:26,407 --> 00:02:27,451
that orange chicken later!

68
00:02:27,495 --> 00:02:28,670
- Is that why
you took her down?

69
00:02:28,713 --> 00:02:30,889
Do you even know about
the missing cocaine?

70
00:02:30,933 --> 00:02:32,413
- Cocaine?
- So we don't know

71
00:02:32,456 --> 00:02:33,675
where Debbie has hidden
the drugs.

72
00:02:33,718 --> 00:02:35,546
We searched her car,
her apartment--

73
00:02:35,590 --> 00:02:37,635
we even tried
the location data on her phone,

74
00:02:37,679 --> 00:02:39,202
but she was smart,
she had it turned off.

75
00:02:39,246 --> 00:02:40,290
- Or her battery died.

76
00:02:40,334 --> 00:02:41,465
According to
her Screen Time app,

77
00:02:41,509 --> 00:02:43,337
she plays five hours a day
of a game

78
00:02:43,380 --> 00:02:45,295
called "Cool Girl in School."

79
00:02:45,339 --> 00:02:46,557
- I love "CGIS."

80
00:02:46,601 --> 00:02:48,168
I just made captain
of the color guard.

81
00:02:48,211 --> 00:02:49,169
Junior year's looking up.

82
00:02:49,212 --> 00:02:50,300
- The coke Debbie took

83
00:02:50,344 --> 00:02:51,736
was evidence
against Silvio Nucci.

84
00:02:51,780 --> 00:02:53,129
Now, he wanted it gone,

85
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:54,913
and I think he got Debbie
to do his dirty work.

86
00:02:54,957 --> 00:02:56,741
- I'm sorry,
you think Debbie is working

87
00:02:56,785 --> 00:02:59,222
with notorious crime boss
Silvio Nucci?

88
00:02:59,266 --> 00:03:00,745
The same Debbie who has
a denim jacket

89
00:03:00,789 --> 00:03:02,399
that says "Rock 'n Roll"?
- It was her.

90
00:03:02,443 --> 00:03:03,531
I heard her setting up a drop.

91
00:03:03,574 --> 00:03:04,836
- And why were you
in the women's room?

92
00:03:04,880 --> 00:03:06,490
- It wasn't for a gross reason.

93
00:03:06,534 --> 00:03:08,449
The men's room was occupied,
and I had to dump out.

94
00:03:08,492 --> 00:03:10,494
- Well, as long as
it wasn't for a gross reason.

95
00:03:10,538 --> 00:03:12,453
- We know you did it, Debbie.

96
00:03:12,496 --> 00:03:14,759
Just tell me the truth.
Let me be your friend here.

97
00:03:14,803 --> 00:03:17,458
- Thank you, but I already have
plenty of friends.

98
00:03:17,501 --> 00:03:21,331
Gil, Finn, Goldie, Bubbles--

99
00:03:21,375 --> 00:03:24,334
- Those are clearly just
the names of your pet fish.

100
00:03:24,378 --> 00:03:25,901
- Okay, fine.

101
00:03:25,944 --> 00:03:28,382
They're my fish.

102
00:03:28,425 --> 00:03:29,687
And I took the drugs.

103
00:03:29,731 --> 00:03:31,863
I'm sorry.
I screwed everything up.

104
00:03:31,907 --> 00:03:33,952
- Okay, this is good.

105
00:03:33,996 --> 00:03:35,519
Now just tell me
why you did it.

106
00:03:35,563 --> 00:03:37,608
- Because I need my drugs.

107
00:03:37,652 --> 00:03:39,697
I'm a big time drug girl.

108
00:03:39,741 --> 00:03:41,699
- Debbie, I don't think
that's true.

109
00:03:41,743 --> 00:03:44,354
I think Silvio Nucci
forced you to do this

110
00:03:44,398 --> 00:03:45,964
against your will.
- Nucci?

111
00:03:46,008 --> 00:03:48,924
[laughs]

112
00:03:48,967 --> 00:03:51,840
What?
[laughs]

113
00:03:51,883 --> 00:03:54,016
- She sat there and laughed
for 40 minutes.

114
00:03:54,059 --> 00:03:55,322
- She's never gonna
turn on Nucci.

115
00:03:55,365 --> 00:03:56,714
I'll bet she's heard stories

116
00:03:56,758 --> 00:03:58,238
of what he does to people
who testify against him.

117
00:03:58,281 --> 00:03:59,500
- Man, I wish there
was something we could do

118
00:03:59,543 --> 00:04:00,631
to help her.
- Why?

119
00:04:00,675 --> 00:04:01,937
- Well, I know
she committed a crime,

120
00:04:01,980 --> 00:04:03,547
but she's clearly
in over her head.

121
00:04:03,591 --> 00:04:05,027
I don't think she's actually
a bad person.

122
00:04:05,070 --> 00:04:06,724
- She's a grown-up
who made her own decisions,

123
00:04:06,768 --> 00:04:08,291
and now she has to suffer
the consequences.

124
00:04:08,335 --> 00:04:09,684
- You might not get it,
but personally,

125
00:04:09,727 --> 00:04:11,033
I relate to someone
who made a mistake

126
00:04:11,076 --> 00:04:12,426
and can't find their way
out of it.

127
00:04:12,469 --> 00:04:14,732
When I was younger,
I was thoroughly hoodwinked

128
00:04:14,776 --> 00:04:17,474
by the so-called good people
at Columbia CD Club.

129
00:04:17,518 --> 00:04:19,259
Next thing you know,
I had 16 copies

130
00:04:19,302 --> 00:04:20,564
of Blind Melon's first album.

131
00:04:20,608 --> 00:04:22,349
- In high school,
I broke into a bunch of houses

132
00:04:22,392 --> 00:04:24,046
and wound up in juvie.
- What? That's terrible.

133
00:04:24,089 --> 00:04:25,917
- I mean, yeah,
Rosa's is a little worse.

134
00:04:25,961 --> 00:04:27,571
- I was in ballet school,
and there was so much pressure

135
00:04:27,615 --> 00:04:29,312
to be perfect all the time
that I just snapped.

136
00:04:29,356 --> 00:04:30,705
If I hadn't been underage,
I would've gone to prison.

137
00:04:30,748 --> 00:04:31,880
It's all the more reason
you should

138
00:04:31,923 --> 00:04:33,273
have sympathy for Debbie
and understand

139
00:04:33,316 --> 00:04:34,926
why she could use our help.
- Nobody helped me.

140
00:04:34,970 --> 00:04:36,188
My parents kicked me
out of the house

141
00:04:36,232 --> 00:04:37,538
and told me I was on my own.
- I'm so sorry

142
00:04:37,581 --> 00:04:38,887
you had to go through
all that alone, Rosa.

143
00:04:38,930 --> 00:04:40,628
- No, it was a good thing.

144
00:04:40,671 --> 00:04:43,021
I had to face my mistakes
and fix them by myself.

145
00:04:43,065 --> 00:04:44,762
It made me a stronger person.
So, no, I don't think

146
00:04:44,806 --> 00:04:46,547
we should take pity on Debbie.
- Okay, fine.

147
00:04:46,590 --> 00:04:48,418
But even so,
wouldn't you rather take down

148
00:04:48,462 --> 00:04:50,333
Silvio Nucci,
a known crime boss,

149
00:04:50,377 --> 00:04:51,421
instead of Debbie Fogle,

150
00:04:51,465 --> 00:04:53,075
a rewards member
at JOANN Fabrics?

151
00:04:53,118 --> 00:04:55,338
- Yeah, but Debbie's not gonna
testify against Nucci.

152
00:04:55,382 --> 00:04:57,601
- You may be right.
And that's why...

153
00:04:57,645 --> 00:04:59,603
we're gonna catch him
in the act.

154
00:04:59,647 --> 00:05:00,952
Brace yourselves, everyone.

155
00:05:00,996 --> 00:05:02,998
We're about to pop that Nucci.

156
00:05:03,041 --> 00:05:04,782
Apologies, that was
inappropriate in the workplace.

157
00:05:04,826 --> 00:05:07,524
But in my defense, that was
a song that I learned about

158
00:05:07,568 --> 00:05:10,571
from Columbia House, Rosa.

159
00:05:10,614 --> 00:05:12,050
Mm.
All right, here's the plan.

160
00:05:13,487 --> 00:05:15,358
- Why are we going this way?
The bathroom's back there.

161
00:05:15,402 --> 00:05:17,404
- I'm breaking you out.
I work for Silvio Nucci.

162
00:05:17,447 --> 00:05:19,623
- Oh, my God.
You work for Nucci? Me too!

163
00:05:19,667 --> 00:05:21,843
- Way too loud, Debbie.

164
00:05:21,886 --> 00:05:23,584
Okay. Press yourself
against the wall

165
00:05:23,627 --> 00:05:26,064
to avoid being seen
by the camera.

166
00:05:26,108 --> 00:05:27,631
- Why didn't she do it
with her back to the wall?

167
00:05:27,675 --> 00:05:29,807
Face first seems like
such a mistake.

168
00:05:29,851 --> 00:05:31,418
[tires screeching]

169
00:05:31,461 --> 00:05:32,984
- Oh, no, they found us!
- No, no, no, Debbie.

170
00:05:33,028 --> 00:05:34,377
Rosa's on Nucci's payroll, too.

171
00:05:34,421 --> 00:05:35,465
She's getting us out of here.
- Oh.

172
00:05:35,509 --> 00:05:36,814
- Debbie. Trunk. Now.

173
00:05:36,858 --> 00:05:38,033
- Sorry, it's a little tight
in there.

174
00:05:38,076 --> 00:05:39,034
- Oh, I'm not picky.

175
00:05:39,077 --> 00:05:40,470
I don't need light or oxygen.

176
00:05:40,514 --> 00:05:42,385
I'm kind of like
a low-maintenance plant.

177
00:05:42,429 --> 00:05:44,126
Ooh, like a succulent.
- That's great, Debbie.

178
00:05:44,169 --> 00:05:45,519
- My mom always said that--
- But the trunk is closing

179
00:05:45,562 --> 00:05:49,000
on its own, it's definitely
not me slamming it.

180
00:05:49,044 --> 00:05:49,218
.

181
00:05:49,261 --> 00:05:51,612
- So you guys
are gonna stay here with me?

182
00:05:51,655 --> 00:05:52,482
- Nucci thought we could
help you guard the coke.

183
00:05:52,526 --> 00:05:53,788
- Oh, I can handle it.

184
00:05:53,831 --> 00:05:54,919
I'm pretty tough.

185
00:05:54,963 --> 00:05:56,486
I take self-defense
at the women's gym.

186
00:05:56,530 --> 00:05:58,270
Hi-ya! Hi-ya!

187
00:05:58,314 --> 00:06:00,316
- Oh, neat. You actually
say the words "hi-ya,"

188
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:01,491
like Miss Piggy.

189
00:06:01,535 --> 00:06:02,579
- So when's Nucci coming
to pick up the coke?

190
00:06:02,623 --> 00:06:05,147
- Uh, could be hours,
could be days.

191
00:06:05,190 --> 00:06:06,409
- Days?
- I don't know.

192
00:06:06,453 --> 00:06:08,150
Nucci just said
to wait by this burner phone.

193
00:06:08,193 --> 00:06:09,586
He said he always works
like that.

194
00:06:09,630 --> 00:06:10,718
- Right, of course.

195
00:06:10,761 --> 00:06:12,589
We have so many inside jokes
about it.

196
00:06:12,633 --> 00:06:15,026
- I can imagine.
He is pretty funny.

197
00:06:15,070 --> 00:06:17,333
He's always like,
"Debbie, if you mess this up,

198
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:18,943
I'm gonna gut you like a fish."

199
00:06:18,987 --> 00:06:19,988
What? [laughs]

200
00:06:20,031 --> 00:06:21,119
- So he threatened you.

201
00:06:21,163 --> 00:06:22,556
That's why you went dirty.
- No.

202
00:06:22,599 --> 00:06:24,906
He offered me
a million dollars.

203
00:06:24,949 --> 00:06:25,994
I had no choice.

204
00:06:26,037 --> 00:06:27,474
My dad is really sick,
and he needed

205
00:06:27,517 --> 00:06:29,519
this expensive
experimental surgery.

206
00:06:29,563 --> 00:06:31,303
- Ahh.
- What about you guys?

207
00:06:31,347 --> 00:06:33,262
How did he turn you?
- Well, I've been dirty

208
00:06:33,305 --> 00:06:35,438
long before Nucci
came onto the scene.

209
00:06:35,482 --> 00:06:36,874
I do a ton of coke.

210
00:06:36,918 --> 00:06:38,223
They call me Mr. Springtime

211
00:06:38,267 --> 00:06:40,487
because of how fast
I make the snow disappear.

212
00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:43,446
- Wow.
I've never even had a nickname.

213
00:06:43,490 --> 00:06:46,449
I mean, I guess people
do call me, "Hey, lady."

214
00:06:46,493 --> 00:06:48,146
- Right, well, I'm gonna
let the Nine-Nine know

215
00:06:48,190 --> 00:06:49,452
we're looking for you,
you know,

216
00:06:49,496 --> 00:06:50,888
so those idiots don't think
we broke you out.

217
00:06:50,932 --> 00:06:52,368
- Ooh, you think
they're idiots?

218
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:53,369
- Oh, yeah, big time.

219
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:54,849
I mean, Holt's a blowhard,

220
00:06:54,892 --> 00:06:56,503
Jeffords is all brawn,
no brains

221
00:06:56,546 --> 00:06:58,548
Boyle's a laughing stock,
Amy's just the worst.

222
00:06:58,592 --> 00:07:00,376
I mean, she thinks
she so smart and so pretty

223
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:01,725
and she makes me feel good
about the world

224
00:07:01,769 --> 00:07:03,423
and my place in it, and she--
- [clears throat]

225
00:07:03,466 --> 00:07:04,902
- Smells like [bleep].
We've all smelled her.

226
00:07:04,946 --> 00:07:07,122
Rosa, let's go outside.

227
00:07:07,165 --> 00:07:08,863
Hey, you know that was
Undercover Jake

228
00:07:08,906 --> 00:07:10,212
talking in there, right?
- Relax, man.

229
00:07:10,255 --> 00:07:11,605
- So you're not gonna tell Amy
what I said.

230
00:07:11,648 --> 00:07:13,520
- Oh, no, I definitely am.
I'm saying relax because

231
00:07:13,563 --> 00:07:15,043
there's no way you can stop me.
- Damn it.

232
00:07:15,086 --> 00:07:16,348
Well, did you at least
text the Nine-Nine

233
00:07:16,392 --> 00:07:17,480
and tell 'em we don't know
when the handoff is?

234
00:07:17,524 --> 00:07:19,003
- Yeah, but man,
I don't like this.

235
00:07:19,047 --> 00:07:20,614
We found the drugs. We should
just forget about Nucci

236
00:07:20,657 --> 00:07:22,050
and take Debbie in.
- What?

237
00:07:22,093 --> 00:07:23,486
Nucci is
the real bad guy, here.

238
00:07:23,530 --> 00:07:25,140
And you heard Debbie,
she's only doing this

239
00:07:25,183 --> 00:07:26,446
to get the money
for her dad's surgery.

240
00:07:26,489 --> 00:07:28,273
- There are other ways
to get money.

241
00:07:28,317 --> 00:07:30,232
She could've gone to a bank.
- Right. And she's white.

242
00:07:30,275 --> 00:07:31,625
She definitely would've
gotten approved.

243
00:07:31,668 --> 00:07:32,974
Terrific point.
- That's not what I was saying.

244
00:07:33,017 --> 00:07:33,975
- Ah, we were both
thinking it.

245
00:07:34,018 --> 00:07:35,367
Anyways, it doesn't matter.

246
00:07:35,411 --> 00:07:36,934
Our plan is working.
What are you worried about?

247
00:07:36,978 --> 00:07:38,980
- There's a loose cannon
in there with two machine guns.

248
00:07:39,023 --> 00:07:40,460
- She's not a loose cannon.

249
00:07:40,503 --> 00:07:42,940
I saw her apologize to a chair
after bumping into it.

250
00:07:42,984 --> 00:07:45,987
Trust me, we are not gonna have
any problems with Debbie.

251
00:07:46,030 --> 00:07:48,337
- Hey, Jake, guess what?
You made cocaine sound so cool,

252
00:07:48,380 --> 00:07:49,381
I decided to try it.

253
00:07:49,425 --> 00:07:50,600
But I didn't wanna overdo it,

254
00:07:50,644 --> 00:07:52,559
so I only did, like,
a tiny, little toot.

255
00:07:52,602 --> 00:07:53,560
Then I didn't feel anything,

256
00:07:53,603 --> 00:07:54,561
so I did, like,
a little bit more,

257
00:07:54,604 --> 00:07:55,823
and I still didn't
feel anything,

258
00:07:55,866 --> 00:07:56,911
so then I did a lot more,
and then I felt it.

259
00:07:56,954 --> 00:07:58,216
Like, I really felt it.

260
00:07:58,260 --> 00:08:00,044
So then I did a couple more,
like, big ass toots.

261
00:08:00,088 --> 00:08:01,524
Why do you guys
keep ducking behind the bed?

262
00:08:01,568 --> 00:08:03,047
- 'Cause you keep
pointing those guns at us.

263
00:08:03,091 --> 00:08:05,180
- Oh, my God.
Do not worry about it.

264
00:08:05,223 --> 00:08:07,138
It's only fine.

265
00:08:07,182 --> 00:08:09,532
- We need to find out
how Nucci got to Debbie.

266
00:08:09,576 --> 00:08:10,664
Fortunately, it turns out

267
00:08:10,707 --> 00:08:12,579
she kept
a fairly comprehensive diary.

268
00:08:12,622 --> 00:08:15,190
- As a power journaler,
I think we can hold off

269
00:08:15,233 --> 00:08:16,539
on using the word
"comprehensive."

270
00:08:16,583 --> 00:08:18,323
Oh, damn, that's comprehensive.

271
00:08:18,367 --> 00:08:21,413
- These are all
just from this year?

272
00:08:21,457 --> 00:08:23,415
- This one is labeled
August 21st.

273
00:08:23,459 --> 00:08:26,288
- "Morning." This one
is August 21st "Evening."

274
00:08:26,331 --> 00:08:29,030
- This entire diary is about
an episode of "House Hunters."

275
00:08:29,073 --> 00:08:30,205
- This is gonna take forever.

276
00:08:30,248 --> 00:08:31,598
- I actually took
a speed reading course.

277
00:08:31,641 --> 00:08:33,687
I tested at 800 WPM.

278
00:08:33,730 --> 00:08:36,167
- That's pathetic.
I tested at 802.

279
00:08:36,211 --> 00:08:37,342
- That's pretty close
to Holt's score.

280
00:08:37,386 --> 00:08:38,735
- No, no, 802's incredible.

281
00:08:38,779 --> 00:08:40,302
She pwned me.

282
00:08:40,345 --> 00:08:42,391
I read the entire
Urban Dictionary

283
00:08:42,434 --> 00:08:44,611
So I could converse with
the other uniformed officers.

284
00:08:44,654 --> 00:08:46,656
Finished I in 47 minutes.

285
00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:49,311
- I've never been so attracted
to a gay man before,

286
00:08:49,354 --> 00:08:50,704
and I dated several in college.

287
00:08:50,747 --> 00:08:52,749
- Shall we have a read-off,
Santiago?

288
00:08:52,793 --> 00:08:55,012
- We don't have finger guards.
- So we do it raw.

289
00:08:55,056 --> 00:08:57,232
- Okay,
I normally don't encourage

290
00:08:57,275 --> 00:08:58,712
such childish competitions,

291
00:08:58,755 --> 00:09:00,496
but this might help
things go faster.

292
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:01,976
My only question is Holt,

293
00:09:02,019 --> 00:09:04,108
are you sure your old ass eyes
are up to the challenge?

294
00:09:04,152 --> 00:09:05,414
- I know you're just trying
to motivate me,

295
00:09:05,457 --> 00:09:06,633
but these old ass eyes

296
00:09:06,676 --> 00:09:09,592
will be reading your tombstone,
son.

297
00:09:11,420 --> 00:09:13,465
- Oh, I needed more light
in this place.

298
00:09:13,509 --> 00:09:14,641
Now I can finally think,

299
00:09:14,684 --> 00:09:16,164
and the ideas are, like,
flowing out of me.

300
00:09:16,207 --> 00:09:18,427
Okay, what about this one?
It's hamburgers,

301
00:09:18,470 --> 00:09:20,081
but the pickles are coins.

302
00:09:20,124 --> 00:09:21,517
- Still feel bad for her
now that she's a cokehead?

303
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,345
- She's not a cokehead.
She's an innocent girl

304
00:09:23,388 --> 00:09:25,608
in a stressful situation
who did cocaine one time

305
00:09:25,652 --> 00:09:26,740
and will probably
never do it again.

306
00:09:26,783 --> 00:09:28,655
- Whoo!
Guess who just did more coke?

307
00:09:28,698 --> 00:09:29,743
This is my thing now.

308
00:09:29,786 --> 00:09:32,180
[phone beeps]
Ooh! Okay.

309
00:09:32,223 --> 00:09:33,616
- Is it Nucci?
- Yes.

310
00:09:33,660 --> 00:09:35,575
He wants to know if I can
do the handoff in two hours.

311
00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:37,185
Um, I'm gonna tell him no

312
00:09:37,228 --> 00:09:39,709
because I'm having so much fun
with my new best friends,

313
00:09:39,753 --> 00:09:41,189
Jake and Rosa.
- Ah, no, no, no.

314
00:09:41,232 --> 00:09:42,669
Don't mention us.
You know, because

315
00:09:42,712 --> 00:09:44,671
you're supposed to be working,
not enjoying yourself.

316
00:09:44,714 --> 00:09:47,108
Right, just keep it short.
Say two hours is great.

317
00:09:47,151 --> 00:09:49,066
- That's very smart,
and I'm gonna send him

318
00:09:49,110 --> 00:09:51,591
my favorite GIF
of Mr. Bean giving a thumbs up.

319
00:09:51,634 --> 00:09:54,071
Oh, Mr. Bean.
What a stud.

320
00:09:54,115 --> 00:09:55,682
Hey Rosa, what would you do

321
00:09:55,725 --> 00:09:57,727
if you could do anything
to Mr. Bean?

322
00:09:57,771 --> 00:09:59,729
- Nothing.
- Come on, Rosa.

323
00:09:59,773 --> 00:10:01,426
Don't be shy.
Say what you would do

324
00:10:01,470 --> 00:10:03,820
to international sex symbol
Mr. Bean's body.

325
00:10:03,864 --> 00:10:06,475
- Fine. I would take
a very large glass--

326
00:10:06,518 --> 00:10:09,565
[bleep]

327
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:12,437
let himself out.

328
00:10:12,481 --> 00:10:13,438
- I see.
- Wow.

329
00:10:13,482 --> 00:10:15,223
Um, I just have
one quick note.

330
00:10:15,266 --> 00:10:17,704
Mr. Bean never--
[bleep]

331
00:10:17,747 --> 00:10:19,575
beg for mercy.
- Ah, great note, Debbie.

332
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,664
The point is we all think
Mr. Bean is sexy as hell

333
00:10:21,708 --> 00:10:22,839
and wish we looked
exactly like him.

334
00:10:22,883 --> 00:10:24,580
- You're closer than you think.
- Hm?

335
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:25,668
- Oh, hey, Rosa,
it's not that

336
00:10:25,712 --> 00:10:26,713
you're a third wheel
or anything,

337
00:10:26,756 --> 00:10:27,931
it's just that
we're out of ice,

338
00:10:27,975 --> 00:10:29,846
so could you go get us
some more ice, please?

339
00:10:29,890 --> 00:10:33,589
- Hey, well,
this is full of ice, but yeah.

340
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:35,112
I'll hit up the Nine-Nine.
- You've actually been

341
00:10:35,156 --> 00:10:37,114
texting the Nine-Nine a lot,
haven't you?

342
00:10:37,158 --> 00:10:38,507
- Yeah, to make sure
our cover's intact,

343
00:10:38,550 --> 00:10:39,682
and so they don't figure out
that we're dirty.

344
00:10:39,726 --> 00:10:40,727
- Is that what's
really going on?

345
00:10:40,770 --> 00:10:42,076
'Cause I feel like
there's something

346
00:10:42,119 --> 00:10:43,251
you're not telling me.
- I feel like

347
00:10:43,294 --> 00:10:44,731
all that coke
is making you paranoid.

348
00:10:44,774 --> 00:10:46,167
- No, you're paranoid.

349
00:10:46,210 --> 00:10:47,734
Now, don't you dare
take another step.

350
00:10:47,777 --> 00:10:49,736
- [chuckles] Okay, Debbie,
what are you doing?

351
00:10:49,779 --> 00:10:51,563
- Give me your phone.
- That's it.

352
00:10:51,607 --> 00:10:53,478
Debbie Fogle,
you are under arrest.

353
00:10:53,522 --> 00:10:54,479
- What? Oh, my God.

354
00:10:54,523 --> 00:10:55,567
Are you not really dirty?
- Ah--

355
00:10:55,611 --> 00:10:57,439
- No. And I'll be
taking that gun.

356
00:10:57,482 --> 00:11:00,485
- Hi-ya!
- [grunting]

357
00:11:00,529 --> 00:11:02,444
- Okay so the women's gym
and the cocaine

358
00:11:02,487 --> 00:11:04,489
have given Debbie super powers.

359
00:11:04,533 --> 00:11:08,798
Cool. Cool, cool, cool,
cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.

360
00:11:08,842 --> 00:11:09,059
.

361
00:11:09,103 --> 00:11:10,670
- You're making a big mistake,
Debbie.

362
00:11:10,713 --> 00:11:11,845
This isn't gonna work.

363
00:11:11,888 --> 00:11:13,368
- I'm such a terrible
judge of character.

364
00:11:13,411 --> 00:11:14,891
I was wrong about Rosa,

365
00:11:14,935 --> 00:11:17,067
I missed all the signs
with my cousin Jared.

366
00:11:17,111 --> 00:11:19,635
- The sandwich guy.
- What is wrong with me?

367
00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:20,897
- Nothing,
you're just coming down

368
00:11:20,941 --> 00:11:22,594
from the many handfuls of coke
you did.

369
00:11:22,638 --> 00:11:24,248
- Right. I'm so dumb.
I'm such an idiot.

370
00:11:24,292 --> 00:11:25,772
I'm dumb!
I'm dumb!

371
00:11:25,815 --> 00:11:27,904
- Ah, hey, why don't you let me
hold your gun for you,

372
00:11:27,948 --> 00:11:29,776
and then you can hit yourself
in the face with your fist

373
00:11:29,819 --> 00:11:31,255
like a normal person
having a mental breakdown.

374
00:11:31,299 --> 00:11:33,127
- I can't give you my gun.

375
00:11:33,170 --> 00:11:34,389
You'll probably try
and arrest me.

376
00:11:34,432 --> 00:11:36,043
- Debbie, I'm not like Rosa.

377
00:11:36,086 --> 00:11:37,174
Here, check my phone.

378
00:11:37,218 --> 00:11:38,393
I haven't been texting
the Nine-Nine.

379
00:11:38,436 --> 00:11:40,308
I have nothing to hide.

380
00:11:40,351 --> 00:11:42,266
- I don't know, there are
a lot of sweet messages

381
00:11:42,310 --> 00:11:43,964
between you and Amy.

382
00:11:44,007 --> 00:11:45,356
I thought you said
she stinks like [bleep].

383
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:46,880
- She does.
- Prove it.

384
00:11:46,923 --> 00:11:48,011
Describe her stink to me.

385
00:11:48,055 --> 00:11:49,273
Don't think about it,
just say it.

386
00:11:49,317 --> 00:11:51,058
- Bad mayo, three-day-old
macaroni salad.

387
00:11:51,101 --> 00:11:54,278
- Okay. I buy it.
I trust you.

388
00:11:54,322 --> 00:11:55,976
- Why'd you do that?
- Rosa probably

389
00:11:56,019 --> 00:11:57,281
told the Nine-Nine
that you're corrupt

390
00:11:57,325 --> 00:11:58,935
and they could use your phone
to track us

391
00:11:58,979 --> 00:12:00,328
to the new drop site.
- Oh.

392
00:12:00,371 --> 00:12:01,982
Right. Smart.

393
00:12:02,025 --> 00:12:03,461
Hey, should I drive?
You know, that way,

394
00:12:03,505 --> 00:12:05,072
you can take a nap and get
the coke out of your system.

395
00:12:05,115 --> 00:12:06,290
- [snorting]
- And we'll both be calm and--

396
00:12:06,334 --> 00:12:08,075
and you just did a bunch more.
- I did!

397
00:12:08,118 --> 00:12:11,165
I'm the King of New York!
I'm driving! Whoo!

398
00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:13,863
♪

399
00:12:13,907 --> 00:12:16,866
- So how's it going?
- What do you want, Terry?

400
00:12:16,910 --> 00:12:18,825
Or are you just here
to fan some more flames?

401
00:12:18,868 --> 00:12:21,218
- No, I'm just here
to see who's losing

402
00:12:21,262 --> 00:12:23,699
and therefore has to
wear this hat I made

403
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,919
that says, "More Stupider."
[laughs]

404
00:12:25,962 --> 00:12:27,877
Fine, yeah,
I'm fanning flames.

405
00:12:27,921 --> 00:12:29,792
Fan, fan, fan, fan, fan,
Santiago.

406
00:12:29,836 --> 00:12:32,795
- Don't call her Santiago,
call her Virginia Slim.

407
00:12:32,839 --> 00:12:35,798
Because I'm smoking her.
- Damn, Ray!

408
00:12:35,842 --> 00:12:37,800
- You guys are moving fast,
but there's no way

409
00:12:37,844 --> 00:12:39,889
you're actually
comprehending anything.

410
00:12:39,933 --> 00:12:42,065
I'm taking my time
and reading deliberately,

411
00:12:42,109 --> 00:12:44,807
and you know what they say,
slow and steady wins the race.

412
00:12:44,851 --> 00:12:47,157
- Psh, classic reg-reader
bullcrap.

413
00:12:47,201 --> 00:12:48,332
- Yeah, what are you
gonna say next,

414
00:12:48,376 --> 00:12:49,986
that you read to relax?

415
00:12:50,030 --> 00:12:53,033
[both laugh]

416
00:12:55,862 --> 00:12:57,037
[both sigh]

417
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:58,342
- This is so much better

418
00:12:58,386 --> 00:12:59,822
than that dump
of a hotel, right?

419
00:12:59,866 --> 00:13:01,171
[sniffs] This place
has six chimneys.

420
00:13:01,215 --> 00:13:02,825
- Uh, hey, Debbie,
whose house is this?

421
00:13:02,869 --> 00:13:04,174
- Oh, it's mine.
I own it, um,

422
00:13:04,218 --> 00:13:05,785
until 11:00 a.m. on Monday.

423
00:13:05,828 --> 00:13:06,829
We have to be out by then,

424
00:13:06,873 --> 00:13:09,179
or it's another $45,000
to Airbnb.

425
00:13:09,223 --> 00:13:11,834
But until then,
I'm a mansion girl.

426
00:13:11,878 --> 00:13:12,835
- What happened
to using the money

427
00:13:12,879 --> 00:13:14,141
for your father's surgery?

428
00:13:14,184 --> 00:13:15,838
Was that a lie?
- No. My dad really is sick,

429
00:13:15,882 --> 00:13:18,014
but I found out this morning
that my stupid brother Derek

430
00:13:18,058 --> 00:13:19,363
already paid for his surgery.

431
00:13:19,407 --> 00:13:20,756
He thinks he so great
'cause he's, like,

432
00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:22,932
a big shot lawyer,
and he has a family,

433
00:13:22,976 --> 00:13:24,281
and he's not afraid of ghosts.

434
00:13:24,325 --> 00:13:26,849
Well, guess what?
I get to keep the cash now.

435
00:13:26,893 --> 00:13:29,983
So take that, Derek,
and, you know, put it.

436
00:13:30,026 --> 00:13:31,898
♪ She's a mansion girl

437
00:13:31,941 --> 00:13:33,900
♪ She's so rich and she's hot

438
00:13:33,943 --> 00:13:36,119
♪ She's a mansion girl

439
00:13:36,163 --> 00:13:39,340
♪ With a kitchen island

440
00:13:39,383 --> 00:13:40,558
- Little pitchy.
- Still think

441
00:13:40,602 --> 00:13:41,951
Debbie's a good person?
- Not gonna lie,

442
00:13:41,995 --> 00:13:43,779
the whole dad reveal
did not help my case.

443
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:44,867
All right, I'm gonna
use her burner phone

444
00:13:44,911 --> 00:13:46,782
to call the Nine-Nine.

445
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,915
- Look what I found.
Do you like it, Jake?

446
00:13:48,958 --> 00:13:50,830
- Uh, yes! I love it.

447
00:13:50,873 --> 00:13:52,483
Real Cruella de Vil vibes.

448
00:13:52,527 --> 00:13:54,224
- No, no, no.
I'm not Cruella de Vil.

449
00:13:54,268 --> 00:13:56,009
I would never hurt dogs.

450
00:13:56,052 --> 00:13:57,401
I'm Perdita!
- Who?

451
00:13:57,445 --> 00:14:00,230
- The romantic lead
of the film.

452
00:14:00,274 --> 00:14:02,058
Pongo's wife.

453
00:14:02,102 --> 00:14:03,886
The girl dog.
- Yes, yes!

454
00:14:03,930 --> 00:14:06,193
[laughs] Of course,
you look exactly like Perdita.

455
00:14:06,236 --> 00:14:08,456
- Oh, my God.
Thank you so much.

456
00:14:16,943 --> 00:14:17,900
- Hey Debbie?
- Hm?

457
00:14:17,944 --> 00:14:19,249
- Will you hand me your phone

458
00:14:19,293 --> 00:14:20,903
so I can take your picture
and you can Gram this?

459
00:14:20,947 --> 00:14:22,905
- [gasps]
- I mean, the house, this coat,

460
00:14:22,949 --> 00:14:24,559
you're gonna wanna
show this off to people, right?

461
00:14:24,602 --> 00:14:26,169
- That is such a good idea.

462
00:14:26,213 --> 00:14:28,171
I do wanna show off to people.

463
00:14:28,215 --> 00:14:29,433
I just have to
make a quick call.

464
00:14:29,477 --> 00:14:31,435
Hi, Mom.
Do you like my mansion?

465
00:14:31,479 --> 00:14:33,394
- Deborah Lyn,
why are you holding a gun?

466
00:14:33,437 --> 00:14:36,223
- Oh, my God, Mom!
I'm wearing a fur coat

467
00:14:36,266 --> 00:14:37,528
and that's what you focus on?

468
00:14:37,572 --> 00:14:40,270
I hate you so freaking much.

469
00:14:40,314 --> 00:14:42,055
- This is ridiculous.
Neither of you

470
00:14:42,098 --> 00:14:43,447
have even taken
a bathroom break.

471
00:14:43,491 --> 00:14:44,753
- Are you kidding me?

472
00:14:44,796 --> 00:14:46,537
Do you think
world record-holder Howard Berg

473
00:14:46,581 --> 00:14:49,279
would stop in the middle
of a read-off to expel?

474
00:14:49,323 --> 00:14:50,585
- [inhales sharply] Ow.

475
00:14:50,628 --> 00:14:52,848
- What's going on, Santiago?
- It's nothing.

476
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:55,459
It's my guide finger.
I've got paper burn.

477
00:14:55,503 --> 00:14:57,287
- Let me see.
- Hm.

478
00:14:57,331 --> 00:14:59,550
- Santiago, you're hurt.

479
00:14:59,594 --> 00:15:01,901
Don't be a hero.

480
00:15:01,944 --> 00:15:04,120
- [sighs]

481
00:15:04,164 --> 00:15:05,905
- Damn.
You must've been cooking.

482
00:15:05,948 --> 00:15:07,428
- I was.
- Let's take a break,

483
00:15:07,471 --> 00:15:09,125
put some ointment on that.
- Right. And when I come back,

484
00:15:09,169 --> 00:15:11,432
my finger's slipping
all over the page.

485
00:15:11,475 --> 00:15:14,478
Nice try. I'm not falling
for any of your tricks.

486
00:15:14,522 --> 00:15:16,176
- Oh, but you already have.

487
00:15:16,219 --> 00:15:18,482
While you were waggling
your finger in the air,

488
00:15:18,526 --> 00:15:21,094
I've been reading all this time
out of the corner of my eye.

489
00:15:21,137 --> 00:15:22,182
- Damn it!

490
00:15:22,225 --> 00:15:23,879
- Why are you doing this,
Deborah Lyn?

491
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:25,837
- Because you're being
so mean, Mom.

492
00:15:25,881 --> 00:15:27,274
Also, I know that
if I didn't tie you up,

493
00:15:27,317 --> 00:15:28,884
you'd probably go
run and find your phone

494
00:15:28,928 --> 00:15:31,321
so you could call Derek.
- Maybe we should call Derek.

495
00:15:31,365 --> 00:15:33,933
He could help. He's a lawyer.
- Yeah, I know he's a lawyer.

496
00:15:33,976 --> 00:15:35,369
Do you think you could go
more than five minutes

497
00:15:35,412 --> 00:15:36,500
without bringing that up?

498
00:15:36,544 --> 00:15:38,502
- You have to get
the gun from her.

499
00:15:38,546 --> 00:15:40,287
- I know, but how do I
get close enough?

500
00:15:40,330 --> 00:15:42,071
- There's one way. She clearly
has a thing for you.

501
00:15:42,115 --> 00:15:43,290
- Why do you say that?
Just because

502
00:15:43,333 --> 00:15:45,118
she has a fantasy of us
as a dog couple?

503
00:15:45,161 --> 00:15:47,511
Wait. Yeah, I see it.
That's gonna work.

504
00:15:47,555 --> 00:15:49,644
- Very tacky. And it's like,
you don't even care

505
00:15:49,687 --> 00:15:51,037
how many chimneys I have.

506
00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:52,516
- Hey, sorry to interrupt.

507
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:54,214
Mrs. Fogle,
we weren't introduced.

508
00:15:54,257 --> 00:15:56,172
I'm Jake, Debbie's boyfriend.

509
00:15:56,216 --> 00:15:59,436
- You are? We are?
- I mean, yeah,

510
00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:02,352
if you're into it.
- I am. I do.

511
00:16:02,396 --> 00:16:04,528
See, Mom. I am with someone.

512
00:16:04,572 --> 00:16:06,095
All those psychics were wrong.

513
00:16:06,139 --> 00:16:08,489
- So listen, babe--
- Yes, babe?

514
00:16:08,532 --> 00:16:10,186
- I was thinking--
- About what, babe?

515
00:16:10,230 --> 00:16:11,535
- That we--
- Go on, babe.

516
00:16:11,579 --> 00:16:13,015
- Wow, you really latched onto
the babe thing.

517
00:16:13,059 --> 00:16:14,364
- I love it.
- Great, great, great.

518
00:16:14,408 --> 00:16:15,800
Well, anyways,
I was just gonna say

519
00:16:15,844 --> 00:16:17,193
that, you know, once we're done
with this big score,

520
00:16:17,237 --> 00:16:18,412
we need a place to hide out.

521
00:16:18,455 --> 00:16:20,196
Somewhere where the cops
could never find us.

522
00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:23,634
- Ooh, like Epcot.
- Uhh, yes, Epcot is great.

523
00:16:23,678 --> 00:16:24,853
That's exactly
what I was thinking.

524
00:16:24,896 --> 00:16:27,377
- We can kiss in front of
the Eiffel Tower,

525
00:16:27,421 --> 00:16:28,944
on the canals of Venice,

526
00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:30,902
oh, in the Canada pavilion.

527
00:16:30,946 --> 00:16:33,209
- Yes, but why wait
till the Canada Pavilion

528
00:16:33,253 --> 00:16:35,037
when we can start right now?

529
00:16:35,081 --> 00:16:36,038
Huh?
- Oh, my God.

530
00:16:36,082 --> 00:16:38,562
This is happening.
- Come here.

531
00:16:38,606 --> 00:16:39,650
Eh--
[struggling efforts]

532
00:16:39,694 --> 00:16:41,478
[grunts]
- Hi-ya!

533
00:16:41,522 --> 00:16:45,047
What the hell, babe?

534
00:16:45,091 --> 00:16:45,482
.

535
00:16:45,526 --> 00:16:47,223
- Debbie,
what's your plan here?

536
00:16:47,267 --> 00:16:48,268
Talk to me.
- Why? So you can

537
00:16:48,311 --> 00:16:49,791
just tell me
more beautiful lies?

538
00:16:49,834 --> 00:16:51,488
You think you can
just lick your lips

539
00:16:51,532 --> 00:16:54,100
and make me weak in the knees?
- No.

540
00:16:56,450 --> 00:16:58,017
- Nice try,
but I closed my eyes

541
00:16:58,060 --> 00:16:59,105
so I didn't even see it.

542
00:16:59,148 --> 00:17:00,149
[beeping]
- Oh, come on.

543
00:17:00,193 --> 00:17:02,804
- Oh. Nucci's on his way.
[laughs]

544
00:17:02,847 --> 00:17:04,066
And I'm about to be rich.

545
00:17:04,110 --> 00:17:05,502
- Debbie, this is bad.

546
00:17:05,546 --> 00:17:07,461
You don't wanna be
an accessory to murder.

547
00:17:07,504 --> 00:17:08,723
- W-what are you talking about?

548
00:17:08,766 --> 00:17:09,854
- What do you think
is gonna happen

549
00:17:09,898 --> 00:17:11,508
when Nucci gets here
and finds two cops?

550
00:17:11,552 --> 00:17:13,554
He's gonna kills us.

551
00:17:13,597 --> 00:17:14,772
- Yeah, I know that.

552
00:17:14,816 --> 00:17:17,079
Um, I've obviously thought
all this through,

553
00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:21,083
and it all is going
according to my plans.

554
00:17:21,127 --> 00:17:22,128
[debris clattering]

555
00:17:22,171 --> 00:17:23,085
I'm sorry,
I just started trembling

556
00:17:23,129 --> 00:17:25,087
and I accidentally--

557
00:17:25,131 --> 00:17:27,959
- Debbie, please,
just put the gun down!

558
00:17:28,003 --> 00:17:29,744
- I just talked to the manager
at the hotel

559
00:17:29,787 --> 00:17:30,788
where the handoff
was happening.

560
00:17:30,832 --> 00:17:32,051
He said Debbie's room
was empty,

561
00:17:32,094 --> 00:17:33,791
and there's no sign
of Rosa or Jake.

562
00:17:33,835 --> 00:17:35,271
Is there anything
in those diaries

563
00:17:35,315 --> 00:17:36,707
that can help us find 'em?
- Debbie mentioned her mom

564
00:17:36,751 --> 00:17:38,100
a bunch in one of
the ones I read.

565
00:17:38,144 --> 00:17:39,101
Seems like
she tells her everything.

566
00:17:39,145 --> 00:17:40,581
- Ooh, that's a good lead.

567
00:17:40,624 --> 00:17:42,104
- It is a good lead, isn't it?

568
00:17:42,148 --> 00:17:43,758
Did you hear that,
speed freaks?

569
00:17:43,801 --> 00:17:45,586
- Let's find out all we can
about the mom.

570
00:17:45,629 --> 00:17:47,109
- I'll start reading
right away

571
00:17:47,153 --> 00:17:49,503
because slow and steady wins--
- Her mother's name

572
00:17:49,546 --> 00:17:51,113
is Margaret Jean Fogle.
- She lives in Bensonhurst.

573
00:17:51,157 --> 00:17:53,115
- She drives a maroon Lexus.
- Vanity plates, "DEREKSMOM."

574
00:17:53,159 --> 00:17:54,464
- She's been married
three times.

575
00:17:54,508 --> 00:17:55,944
- To Horace Mills.
- Then Frank Yelter.

576
00:17:55,987 --> 00:17:57,250
- And then James Fogle.
- She goes grocery shopping

577
00:17:57,293 --> 00:17:58,729
on Tuesdays.
- Water aerobics on Wednesdays.

578
00:17:58,773 --> 00:17:59,991
- Book club on Fridays.
- She drinks too much wine.

579
00:18:00,035 --> 00:18:02,429
- Always a pinot grigio.
- Always from Napa.

580
00:18:02,472 --> 00:18:05,693
- The race.
Slow and steady wins the race.

581
00:18:05,736 --> 00:18:08,783
- Okay, uh, what if I just
tell Nucci not to kill you?

582
00:18:08,826 --> 00:18:10,089
You know,
we're business partners,

583
00:18:10,132 --> 00:18:11,873
we make all of our
business decisions together.

584
00:18:11,916 --> 00:18:13,483
- Yep,
we're all gonna die today.

585
00:18:13,527 --> 00:18:14,702
- Debbie, if you just untie us,

586
00:18:14,745 --> 00:18:16,051
we can help you
get out of here.

587
00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:17,574
- Okay, but if I untie you,
you'll arrest me,

588
00:18:17,618 --> 00:18:18,967
and then I'll go to prison
for the rest of my life.

589
00:18:19,010 --> 00:18:20,229
- You'll be in prison anyway.

590
00:18:20,273 --> 00:18:21,796
I guarantee you
if anything happens to us,

591
00:18:21,839 --> 00:18:23,058
the Nine-Nine
will hunt you down.

592
00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:24,755
- Okay, okay, okay.

593
00:18:24,799 --> 00:18:26,453
Maybe I should surrender.

594
00:18:26,496 --> 00:18:28,150
Uh, but I don't wanna
go to jail.

595
00:18:28,194 --> 00:18:29,804
Okay, I don't know what to do.

596
00:18:29,847 --> 00:18:30,979
Um, Mom, help me.

597
00:18:31,022 --> 00:18:32,241
- Now you need my help?

598
00:18:32,285 --> 00:18:34,591
Please, it doesn't matter
what I say.

599
00:18:34,635 --> 00:18:35,766
You're still gonna mess it up.

600
00:18:35,810 --> 00:18:37,159
Just like you messed up
your bangs

601
00:18:37,203 --> 00:18:38,639
when you had to cut
your own hair.

602
00:18:38,682 --> 00:18:39,901
- Yeah, I'm sure that was
a long time ago.

603
00:18:39,944 --> 00:18:41,120
- That was last year.
- I see.

604
00:18:41,163 --> 00:18:42,904
- Or when you got
in a car accident

605
00:18:42,947 --> 00:18:44,514
when your brother
was going to take the bar.

606
00:18:44,558 --> 00:18:46,516
Or when you lost all your money

607
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:48,823
investing in that cruise line
for cats.

608
00:18:48,866 --> 00:18:50,259
- Feline Cruise Line.
- You know what?

609
00:18:50,303 --> 00:18:52,914
You're not my daughter anymore.
- What?

610
00:18:52,957 --> 00:18:55,569
What are you saying?
- You have embarrassed me

611
00:18:55,612 --> 00:18:57,527
and the family
for the last time.

612
00:18:57,571 --> 00:19:02,576
I'm done with you. Good-bye.
- Shut up, Margaret!

613
00:19:02,619 --> 00:19:04,143
Same crap my parents pulled.

614
00:19:04,186 --> 00:19:06,101
Always pointing out my flaws,
never helping

615
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:08,234
and then bailing
when things got messy.

616
00:19:08,277 --> 00:19:10,149
You know, I was a lot like you.
- You were holed up

617
00:19:10,192 --> 00:19:12,194
with a ton of cocaine
and a bunch of guns?

618
00:19:12,238 --> 00:19:13,674
- That's my business.
- What?

619
00:19:13,717 --> 00:19:15,197
- I spent years telling myself

620
00:19:15,241 --> 00:19:16,633
that tough love
made me stronger,

621
00:19:16,677 --> 00:19:17,982
but you know what I really wish
they'd done?

622
00:19:18,026 --> 00:19:20,681
- What?
- Been nice to me.

623
00:19:20,724 --> 00:19:22,204
I wish they would've told me
I made a mistake,

624
00:19:22,248 --> 00:19:23,684
but they still loved me

625
00:19:23,727 --> 00:19:26,600
and they would help me
try to figure it out.

626
00:19:26,643 --> 00:19:27,992
Would've saved me
a lot of pain.

627
00:19:28,036 --> 00:19:31,082
Debbie, you have made
some really bad choices today.

628
00:19:31,126 --> 00:19:33,084
- Really bad.
- Not now, Debbie's mom.

629
00:19:33,128 --> 00:19:35,609
- You are not a bad person.

630
00:19:35,652 --> 00:19:37,088
If we get out of this alive,
I promise you

631
00:19:37,132 --> 00:19:39,569
I will help you however I can.

632
00:19:39,613 --> 00:19:41,919
- Wow. Thank you.

633
00:19:48,274 --> 00:19:50,580
- Oh, your back is very wet.

634
00:19:50,624 --> 00:19:51,973
- Yeah, I guess between
the fur coat

635
00:19:52,016 --> 00:19:53,583
and all the cocaine,
I've been sweating a lot.

636
00:19:53,627 --> 00:19:54,584
[tires screech, door shuts]

637
00:19:54,628 --> 00:19:55,977
- That's Nucci. He's here.

638
00:19:56,020 --> 00:19:58,545
[dramatic music]

639
00:19:58,588 --> 00:20:00,721
- Hi, Debbie.
Do you have something for me?

640
00:20:00,764 --> 00:20:03,593
- Yes, I do.
I do have something.

641
00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:08,859
I have two friends.
- What the hell is this?

642
00:20:08,903 --> 00:20:11,558
- Drop your weapons.
- No way.

643
00:20:11,601 --> 00:20:14,256
You drop your weapons.

644
00:20:14,300 --> 00:20:16,737
[sirens wailing]

645
00:20:16,780 --> 00:20:18,304
- NYPD!
Everyone down on the ground!

646
00:20:18,347 --> 00:20:20,001
Down on the ground,
right now!

647
00:20:20,044 --> 00:20:21,872
♪

648
00:20:21,916 --> 00:20:23,309
- Put 'em down.

649
00:20:23,352 --> 00:20:25,267
- Don't do anything stupid.
- I will shoot her.

650
00:20:25,311 --> 00:20:26,877
Put down your gun.
- Oh, man,

651
00:20:26,921 --> 00:20:28,270
grabbing Debbie
was a big mistake.

652
00:20:28,314 --> 00:20:29,793
- What do you mean by--
[grunts]

653
00:20:29,837 --> 00:20:32,100
- Hi-ya!
- [grunts]

654
00:20:32,143 --> 00:20:34,581
- Whoa, Debbie,
that was amazing.

655
00:20:34,624 --> 00:20:36,235
- Thanks. By the way,

656
00:20:36,278 --> 00:20:37,801
Jake thinks
you smell like [bleep].

657
00:20:37,845 --> 00:20:39,934
- What? That's weird.
I don't know why she said that.

658
00:20:39,977 --> 00:20:42,066
Anyways, let's get Debbie
into a cop car.

659
00:20:42,850 --> 00:20:45,635
Well, you really
gonna help out Debbie

660
00:20:45,679 --> 00:20:47,246
or did you just say all
that stuff so she'd let us go?

661
00:20:47,289 --> 00:20:49,770
- I told the DA she cooperated
and he agreed to be lenient,

662
00:20:49,813 --> 00:20:51,902
especially since we got Nucci
and the cocaine was returned.

663
00:20:51,946 --> 00:20:53,295
Except for the pound of it
that Debbie did.

664
00:20:53,339 --> 00:20:55,036
- Yeah. The paramedic said
he had never heard

665
00:20:55,079 --> 00:20:56,298
a human heart beat that loudly.

666
00:20:56,342 --> 00:20:57,691
He could hear it
outside of her body.

667
00:20:57,734 --> 00:20:59,867
- Ugh. She'll probably
get ten years.

668
00:20:59,910 --> 00:21:01,390
It's better than 30.
Let's be real,

669
00:21:01,434 --> 00:21:03,131
Debbie's life wasn't gonna
begin till she was 50 anyway.

670
00:21:03,174 --> 00:21:04,306
- Yeah, the kooky aunt vibe

671
00:21:04,350 --> 00:21:05,829
will probably
play a lot better then.

672
00:21:05,873 --> 00:21:08,005
So hey, one more thing.

673
00:21:10,965 --> 00:21:12,880
We can never let anyone know
that we got beat up

674
00:21:12,923 --> 00:21:14,098
by Debbie Fogle.
- Agreed.

675
00:21:14,142 --> 00:21:15,186
- Take it to the grave?
- To the grave.

676
00:21:15,230 --> 00:21:16,187
- This conversation
never happened.

677
00:21:16,231 --> 00:21:17,319
- I don't even know
who you are.

678
00:21:17,363 --> 00:21:18,538
- That's hurtful.
You took it too far.

679
00:21:18,581 --> 00:21:20,148
- That's a weird thing
for a stranger to say.

680
00:21:20,191 --> 00:21:21,715
Bye.

681
00:21:21,758 --> 00:21:22,716
- Okay.

682
00:21:22,759 --> 00:21:24,805
- Not a doctor.
- Shh.


